“I don’t want to grow up.” I tell myself as sleep eludes me and I watch as the moon changes it’s shadow across my carpet. The hours slip one into the next. 25. I’m going to be 25 and the years have slipped one into the next. Why is it so hard? Why am I digging in my heels and clinging to traces of summer nights at Elizabeth Park, bike rides with my Dad, spending hours lost in creativity. Where have the years gone? and how do I move forward?
Maybe it’s not that I don’t want to be 25 but it’s that I’m afraid.
Why does fear do that?
It robs us of our joy in an instant.
I remember when my mom turned 40.
I remember her joy that day. This adventure of life was only growing and she chose joy instead of fear. A celebration into a new chapter and she walked boldly into it. “she laughs with no fear of the future.” Proverbs 31.
My mom laughs with no fear of the future.
She turned 49 this month and she still faces the future with confidence and expectancy, trusting, moving forward, curious, strong.
So I remember where I come from.
I remember what she instilled in me through my years growing up. I remember to do the right thing even if I’m standing alone. To trust in the one who made my heart. To be brave.
I have everything I need.
Childhood is over.
It’s time to face what lays ahead with confidence and joy and trust…
in Him who made me.